Questions in a characters mind

It doesn't take much for the world to collapse within itself and suddenly you're standing on a ledge of crumbling grass looking out over the infinite blackness that tugs so sweetly on your hand calling you to step forward. Fly. Fall. Into the space between stars. Still, I don't know when the dreams started. Maybe the car accident. Or when I took to wandering lonely streets and dark alleys in the dead of night. Maybe it was when I started cliff diving or walking the highway with cars whizzing past on either side, horns blaring. Maybe when I played chicken with the trains or walked the ledge of my highrise apartment, dark eyes closed.

Whenever they started didn't matter though. Dreams I could handle, even welcomed. Hell, I had quite the collection of nightmares, enough to open my own little shop of horrors. No, what bothered me, was when the phantoms followed me through the veil, tearing holes in the delicate butterfly wing fabric of my mind, to reach me in the waking world. To wink at the corner of my eye.

Yeah, that kind of pissed me off.

And part of me knew. Knew I was losing it, that really, truly I was going mad. He even told me so.

Which begs the question, if a figment tells you you're mad, are you really mad at all? Crazy people aren't meant to know they're crazy, right?

The distance of skin

Of Corvus

His hair shone with ebony rainbows, flickers of deep red, deeper blue and the flash of green, silver too, like the colors in an oil spill, sleek beautiful and dangerous in the darkest of it's beauty thick and silky, like feathers without the stem.. His eyes were black as coal and could light with such a furious cimmerian fire.

A pattern of spread wings curled in black ink over his moon-golden shoulders, his cheek furrowed with a trio of lines like the scrape of claws. A rook perched on his ribs, wings spread to take flight. A raven from his hip cawed a sorrowed warning to its brother alighted on his collar,shrinking into the distance of his skin.

Fire escapes

So everyone was amazing on Saturday. So glad I got to see it this time. Bloody awesome show guys.

lets see....

so for our group story
I'm billy
Jill is P.J. in most scenes
Leon is Dead boy and sparky
I think I've already said this. But oh well.

I was feeling like this today :

To the street

She cast her smile

to the street

she tried to set it free

it snagged on rusted fire escapes

was swept with autumn leaves

it fluttered to the cobblestones

was kicked at in the street

it drowned in rainbow oil spills

was crushed under heavy feet

it cowered in dark doorways

was broken piece by piece

it whispered at the corners

was traded to a thief

she cast her smile

to the street

and sold it to be free

Working in hospitality makes it feel like your selling your smile along with the coffee. Turns you rather cynical. *sigh* 

Had the chorus for an old song stuck in my head all day. Caught myself singing. No-one else did mwahaha....

One day left. We better have a graduation or I will be extremely displeased. I might even attend if we have one.

Random ghouls

So got to meet Jenny Hellen who for the most part told us good luck cause the market sucks. She answered a lot of questions I didn't actually ask, in a good way. And we get to send her questions and queries etc. which is awesome, would be more awesome if she had much to do with my genre but beggars can't be choosers.
Group work
What would a dinner party with a ghoul be like? Bloody neat/meat. Bad pun. Okay.... we have 10 pages so far which is pretty good for a collaboration and everyone is pulling their weight and putting up with any and all crazy suggestions I suddenly blurt out. There are four main characters and three writers so the fourth character can really be written by any of us. The other three are our own I guess. Should be interesting to see whether anyone other than us actually manages to figure out the story.

Good luck.

Zombie fairy aaahhhhh!!!!

I don't seem to have the ability to mindlessly ramble on a blog like some never to be mentioned leon-like people... so about our group work-
the story seems to have stagnated in leons corner so I might add some more and see if that can carry us further down this damn river of collaboration which is all too similar to creativity. Except for the lack of total airheads. We always seem to have a few ideas bobbing around in our heads I guess. it's a bit like bobbing for apples, which is harder than you'd think. Halloween is on Wednesday, got a Halloween party tomorrow night after work. I want to be a zombie fairy. Requires minimal effort. Just add a pair of wings and some fake scars. Ordered some cool fangs on trademe but they haven't arrived so that kinda sucks... or doesn't in this case.

Too much effort for me but the idea is the same.

black feathers

So everyone was amazing last night from what I saw. Sorry I had to leave mid-way through. Was watching Sues videos on FB, everyone looks really good. Glad it's over though.


What else to blog about?

.....
.......hmmm.....

Okay excerpt from a story I've written and am now editing again.

It gave a harsh caw, a stone catching it's glimmering ebony wings and the crow plummeted, spiraling out of control, to the slick, unforgiving street.

“No, no! Stop it” I cried, darting forward sharp stones glanced off my raised arms as I struggled to protect my head and shield the fragile creature at once.

The crow fluttered weakly on the damp stone gasping. As I charged into the square, the children scattered, giggling, shrieking as they cast the stones aside.

Falling to my knees, I ignored the latest additions to my myriad collection of bruises.

It struggled, beak wide, seeking air. As I watched, frozen in horror, it's sable eyes glazed and it's weak breaths stalled.

No! agony rippled through me. I felt the dark flame of his life flicker out. No!

“Nyx?”

there was no answer. From the suddenly cold place in my chest, I knew there never would be.

I stroked it's downy feathered breast, my heart aching. Too soon. And tears of diamond ice leaked from beneath my dark eyelashes. My breath rasping. It's beautiful ebony wings torn, it's tiny fluttering heartbeat stalled... 

I hesitated only for a moment, my hand whipping back, curling into a white-knuckled fist which I crushed against my trembling lips. Only a little... what difference could it make? A crows silken wings never slit a mans throat. What consequence could there be, to give it another chance at flight?

Slowly, my pale hand visibly shaking, I rested my fingertips against my heart and I reached deep into that forbidden core, in the center of my chest, where an electrostatic shiver hummed.

The heat reached through the thin barrier of skin and my fingertips were suffused in the tingly golden static of life, drawn from my own heart. Breathing deep, I reached out and caressed the inky feathers, miniature traces of lightning leapt from my hand and jolted the still heart....forcing it to beat.

The crow blinked, intelligence flashing in the dark gaze. It hopped to slightly unsteady feet, ruffling it's midnight feathers.

A slight smile graced my lips as it uttered a harsh caw and took flight, leaving me kneeling in the dust, midnight eyes shimmering in the silvery cast of moonlight.

Ghosts and all

Okay been a while since I got a chance to post a blog but here's the update

Performances:
The line up is looking amazing. Everyone is way too good I don't even want to follow them but I have to so... anyway, My poem is True Story which everyone is probably sick of hearing by now. I know it's beginning to get on my nerves always rattling around in my mind. I was going to do my stalker poem as well but can't seem to remember that so have to either stick to one or switch it for another one I actually know.

Groupwork:
We are doing a rolling story based around hospitals and the morgue for some unknown morbid reason, fantasy based of course. Jill wrote the first piece which I thought led us off real well. I wrote the second piece as a bad tempered ghost and now it's Leon's turn. We'll see how far we can carry it til we get to an ending.

So there, updated.  =P